I know that I am haunted, by something inside me.
Something that grinds me and wears me right down.
Floating in a ghostly dreaming, my demon
A haunting, that I cannot refuse.
I just can’t put my finger on it.
I guess I’ve just got some ghouls.
Over run by your spectral dopplegang.
I know that demon inside me
is trying to escape this pale world:
lost in some nether regìon between reality
and that haunted, unnamed place…
I know that the person I am on the inside
is different to the one outside.
I wonder which of them is the real me,
and who is the unreal soul
I know you’re still inside me:
eating away from within.
Devouring whatever sanity remains;
filling my longing with pain.
Over and over again
I know I must leave you this way:
grieving as tho’ at a wake.
Hurts me to see you this day;
I’d much rather celebrate;
but I am dead to you.
I know I must fly like the wind:
flee away, get above every thing.
Like a leaf blown around in the air;
floating crazily: not going nowhere.
I will not drink that bitter concoction;
that brings out demons
from the pathways of my dark soul.
Running shadows, with wild screaming eyes
I will not taste that sweet elixer
that dulls my senses and makes me inebriate to you;
lest I feel lonlier than a far-off star in the night.
Far from the comfort of any home;
far from the the warmth of your light;
slowly and lonely I roam,
destitute of your love in this cold night
Playing a shell game with my numbed mind.
Playing chess with a sad heart.
Take a queen – leave her behind.
Take my pawn, rip his soul apart.
March 7, 2009